I never thought I would be saying this: but I WILL be teaching a self defense class this weekend for about 60 to 80 of the women on
UK's campus. (this program is part of the UK Violence & Intervention Prevention center on campus V.I.P) This is only a part of the larger conference which will be held at the
Marriot Hotel this weekend. Many of you may know this group as what used to be known as "The Women's Place" This group on campus aims to make the UK campus safer for Women. . - - yet ironically- my contribution to this organization consists of actually teaching violence..? hum...that makes sense. for instance: I'll be teaching women how to perform blocks, quick finishes, going for the eyes, using swift elbows to the face, and powerful knees to the groin. ...(allow me to go ahead and apologize the the entire male gender as a whole and say: sorry, sorry if any of the girls that I teach this weekend beat the living crap out of you!)
While this post does sound like a joke. it's not. (although it is being typed a very light-hearted, in fact quite humorous tone)... Honestly, I think the reason that I'm even posting on this is due to being nervous about the weekend. I'm not really sure why I'm nervous, maybe it's because I"M ACTUALLY TEACHING A WOMEN"S SELF DEFENSE CLASS!... what in
tha world..? ha ha, it actually feels weirder typing it out than thinking it. anyway but also, my nervousness comes from the fact that there are a lot of what ifs...
What if I'm demonstrating with a girl in front of the group and she gets rowdy and performs a perfect knee-to-the-groin...(on me)..
ahh -
What if I fall for one of the girls because she is beautiful - yet when I ask her out, she feels threatened and performs one of the moves that she had just learned from me...
What if - I actually ENJOY this class.
What if, I watch Napoleon Dynamite before Saturday and decide to wear American Flag pants and perform a round-house kick as I teach the class.
What if I had never posted on this and kept the "Women's Self Defense Instructor" side of me a secret...
What if I help save a woman's life...
the bottom line is
A WHOLE LOTTA THIS , WILL BE
GOIN' ON THIS WEEKEND....!!!!!.
(minus the pictures with the guys with guns & knives...)
get hype. Can you feel that intensity?
my manhood is on the line...may God grant me victory.
However, in the upper left corner and lower right corner: this depicts what will happen to you if you try and stop me from going to Applebee's when I want half-price appetizers....